Lance Moore

• Comment from Cezar

  Posted at: December 2, 2015 at 8:22 am

  I’m a bit late on this thread. just to esstilbah certain things I’m a ciswoman. had an ex fiance who was a transman. Have a close buddy who is a transman. And I live in a country where intersex people and transwomen are worshiped and feared for having divine powers. So that’s how I’m here on this website and have been for some time. Anyway, Grtransguy you’ve taken the words out of my mouth.I feel it’s good that you are open to talking about answering questions. To answer or not, is everyone’s prerogative. Everyone’s circumstances vary. No one should stand in judgement of another person. What works for one transperson need not work for another. And each to his own, I say.But I feel it is better to learn about trans issues from a transperson themselves.Since it is so much more personalized. Turning to the media (books, tv, internet) for answers is not the same.Also to assume most cispeople are out to get transpeople, make fun of them or ask questions for their cheap thrills is unfortunate and very demeaning.In every culture what can be asked and what cannot be discussed varies. In a place like American which is so multicultural and heterogenous, it must be much tougher to decide what the boundaries are. what is okay with one group of people may not be okay with another group of people.Personally I am very grateful to transpeople who take the time off to educate. Who are kindhearted about the unintentional lack of finesse some cispeople may have and make allowances for them.My first brush with transwomen was with the Hijra community, in my country was when I was younger. They used to come to collect alms. People used to be afraid to open their doors to them. I was secretly a bit scared. Fear is learned. Later on, I clearly remember being in the 6th grade and my mom was waiting with me for the school bus and a group of transwomen were going about collecting alms. One of them, a lovely, very beautiful transwoman smiled at me. It was a kind smile. She figuratively put her hand out to me, and I was a changed person. I have never feared the hijra community after that. What you dont know, you fear, and what you fear you hate. Anyway I used to frequent an LGBT center in my city and I eventually had the opportunity to talk to some ladies from the hijra community. And that deepened my great respect for them. If I ever thought I was different’ from them, after speaking to them I realised that we were the same in many of our likes and dislikes and attitudes. It’s always good to mix and mingle with people who you perceive to be different. You’ll see that many times, we are more like than unlike each other.I feel every re10f8lationship is a two way street. You have to give to get. I’m glad there are men like you grtransguy. Everyone is different about the Q&A part which is but natural. But what you put out you get back. I say spend some time educating people and you will get an educated response. Ignore the ignorant, and you will get only ignorance. This is my personal opinion. Saying that, I’d also say it is physically and mentally and emotionally demanding to open yourself to people. As a muslim woman who has to constantly deal with stereotypes and people thinking all muslims are terrorists and all muslims demean their women, gosh it can get really quite tough to educate people. Some days I snap off answers and bite peoples heads off. Other days I just get jaded and ignore. And thank God that when it really matters I have found the strength to open my mouth and talk somehow I find the strength to, and educate an ignorant person. I cannot do it all the time, it is EXHAUSTING. But when I can, I do.Like I say, each to his own.

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